Brad Messer Commentary
8:15 a.m. Monday, Jan. 20, 2003

I will now perform the great public service of making all of us feel superior. At least superior to George Curtis and Ed Blaine, crooks. Dumb and dumber.

George Curtis is 75. He wanted money to buy an RV to impress his girlfriend with a trip to Mount Rushmore. Walked into a bank in Harrisonville, Missouri with a replica handgun. Forced the teller to make out a Cashier's Cheque for 200-thousand bucks. Bought a big RV with the check. George and his girlfriend made it as far as Sioux Falls, South Dakota before the cops ended the vacation. George will make restitution and serve 5 years.

Ed Butler was dumber. Parked his car, went in and robbed a bank in Port Royal, Virginia, came running out with a bag of money, and hundred dollar bills stuffed in his pockets. Got to the getaway car. He had locked his keys inside. Tried to bash open the driver's window with a log, but couldn't. Citizens chased him, $100 notes flying from his pockets. Two men tackled Ed: one of 'em had a gun. Ed thereupon shot himself in his leg, and the citizen with a gun shot him again in the same leg. Which pretty much ended what little getaway there had been.

Compared to ol' George and Ed, we're all pretty slick operators. There, you can start off your week feeling superior.

Brad Messer— commentary, KTSA.


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