Brad Messer Commentary
8:15 a.m. Friday, Feb. 14, 2003

Valentine: What a Guy!

This is a holiday of love and affection— which is weird, in light of it being named for a guy who was executed about 17 centuries ago.

The story is very loose. The Roman Catholic church recognizes three Saint Valentines, who lived in three different time periods. Other than the name and the sainthood, they had one other major thing in common: they all got themselves executed for this or that.

One was a Roman who refused to renounce Christianity. He was supposedly beheaded on February 14th in the year 269. Another version has St. Valentine, as a priest, performing marriages in secret, when it was illegal for young men of army age to get married. For his trouble, he was thrown into a cell and eventually, you know. Or you may prefer the version in which Father Valentine actually sends the first Valentine from his prison cell, before (SFX).

Nobody really knows now, because no one took good notes back during all of this carrying on and neck-chopping.

Personally, I am considering making up some outlandish story about the real origin of Valentine's Day, and claiming it is the pure-dee Truth. I am thinking about what I can work into the story— gas prices, Joe Millionaire, Cupid, maybe duct tape. And someone will believe it. After all, some people believe that plastic sheeting and duct tape will make us nerve-gas-proof and germ-proof. I tell you, they will believe anything.

Brad Messer— commentary, KTSA.

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